where bubblegum meets buffy

Bubblegum meets buffy meets sass

2011-01-28T12:47:00.000-08:00

So, after a number of years, I finally remembered this here 'ol blog of mine. It still exists?! Does nothing on the internet fade away?!

If you're interested in reading something a touch more current about me, you should try Bubblegum Sass. Yep, that's right. Bubblegum met Buffy and is now onto Sass...

home sweet home

2007-03-13T10:01:00.000-07:00

Marcus is back, after six days in San Francisco and two days in Calgary! He came home for a brief 16 hours in between the two trips. Suffice to say that he is exhausted from the run-around and emotional turmoil that funerals bring. Chloe was happy to see him, again, but I don't think she trusts him to stick around now. Well, not until he gets back from work tonight and things slide into their normal routine. I am dreading all the things that I must do over the next two weeks. And then I will be in Calgary. I guess I better appreciate the comfy, stable domestic life while it remains, even if it is filled with horrific nightmares (of the dreaming nature, not the real life variety) I can only share with Marcus.

happy world day of prayer!

2007-03-02T10:21:00.000-08:00

I, like many people, had not heard of the World Day of Prayer before. Not sure how I've missed it since even my mother had heard of it before. This year's theme is "United Under God’s Tent". Anyway, just wanted to say "happy world day of prayer" and have a super weekend! Marcus flies out on Sunday and I am looking forward to working on a bunch of stuff that's hanging over me.

and the world keeps spinning

2007-02-28T09:47:00.000-08:00

Haven't gotten a chance to blog properly in a bit. Seems like there's either nothing to write about or I'm too busy to take the time to write. I've just been: working, doing stuff for at-arts, sewing a bit, making altered book postcards, cleaning house (always fun...), wedding planning, stressing about finances, finding too many calls for art submissions than life will allow me to create for, enjoying the blooming crocuses, bowling with people from church (I bowled 126 and won our game!), and planning my trip back to Calgary in April. March (which I have dubbed "eeeek!!" month) and April are already looking packed full. I'm looking forward to May and June which, I hope, will slow down a bit.

I sewed some cool cushions for our living room, which I need to take pictures of and show off to all of you. Soon, I hope. The At-Arts AGM notices and membership renewal forms are all printed and envelopes are all addressed and stamped, just got to get to the post box. I found a marriage commissioner and will meet with him while I'm back in Calgary. Marcus flies down to San Francisco on Sunday for a video game conference, so I have all next week to myself to get things done. Guess there's no startling developments that need sharing...

Etsy

2007-02-19T10:42:00.000-08:00

I was just wondering is any of you have heard of and/or used the Etsy site? It's a site for "buying and selling all things handmade". Think eBay-chic-handmade-fashion-art-stuff. Anyway, I came across it and it seems fairly popular, although I hadn't heard of it before. And it also appears to be the perfect venue to sell my sewing designs and small art. I'm not sure yet how the service charges compare to an eBay store (will look into it later), but Etsy seems like the kind of place that would be easier to sell your stuff at 'cause the people that visit the site would be willing to pay decent for your work. What do you guys think? I mean, I really am getting to the point where I need an outlet for my creative side (on outlet that would hopefully provide a little extra cash at least). Any advice or suggestions are very welcome (Tina, how's the eBay store thing going?).

technorati fever

2007-02-16T09:43:00.000-08:00

Technorati Profile

Blame, Marcus. He started it.

human emotions

2007-02-03T10:15:00.000-08:00

So, there was this great link on our work blog, that I just have to share. It's basically an engine that searches the internet for "human feelings" from random blogs. The interface for selecting a particular thought/emotion from the massive crowd is really neat. It seems like it would be one of those wacky foundations for a great art project. I feel fine. You feel fine. We Feel Fine. Enjoy...

2007-02-01T11:02:00.000-08:00

So back in the day, veils symbolized the bride's innocence and modesty. Women today consider them a romantic custom. I honestly hadn't really envisioned wearing a veil on my wedding day, but then I tried so many on while looking for the wedding dress, that I got roped into the idea. I mean, when else will I get to wear a veil?! Might as well go for it. But then I got to looking at the price tags hanging from all those veils. The least inexpensive was $150. This is while I'm still trying to come to grips with how much the dress will be. I console myself with the notion that I really won't need to chose the veil until the dress comes in, which is about five months from now. But then it is pointed out to me that, no, in fact, the veils themselves take a least three months to get in. Which means I don't have to decide on the veil that minute, but I do need to make up my mind in the next few weeks.

And that's where the creative sewer in me took hold. Why the heck would I pay $150 for a veil that I could make for about $50 or less?! (I do realize that I might find out why someone would pay that much shortly, if my homemade veil is a disaster :) ) On Monday, I received a sale flyer for Fabricland and noticed that their tulle is currently 50% off. So, last night I took a little trip there, found a pattern for a variety of veil styles and lengths (also 50% off) and bought reams of white tulle to make the veil for only $2.45/m (on sale). I haven't decided what type of headpiece or comb I'll go with, but I can probably find something at Claire's with a little sparkle.

My only dilemma now is, did I make the right choice about the colour of tulle. The dress is a very light ivory. They had both white and ivory tulle in stock, but the ivory just looked too yellow. I may have to take the tulle down to the dress shop in the next couple of days and hold it against the dress.

community of creatives

2007-01-31T09:58:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to share this great article featuring a friend of mine, Kendall Yellowhorn, who is a Calgary menswear designer. He is sooo amazing! Congrats Kendall! You keep me inspired to continue to sew my own creations.

dress success

2007-01-31T09:48:00.001-08:00

yay, website! yay, blog! yay, visiting with my mom! and a special yay to deciding on my wedding dress!!

It was a fairly relaxing, laid back visit with my mom, who flew out to stay with us from January 25-29th. But it was super exciting because we finally got to go dress shopping together! With help from my mom and miss Lisa, I was finally able to make a decision, get sized and order the gown. I also ordered a little sleeveless bolero. Now I just have to wait 5-6 months for it to come in. It seems like a long time, but I have no doubt it will go by fast since we still have about 165 things to do before the big day.

Things we've completed so far:
- booked a venue for ceremony and reception
- booked a photographer
- bought the dress
- compiled the guest list (about 75% done)
- chosen our attendants

Our priorities this month:
- booking a marriage commissioner
- deciding on a veil
- completing the website
- shopping for Marcus' wedding ring

It's coming together...if you have any helpful hints or suggestions, don't hesitate to comment or email!

it's beginning to look a lot like...

2007-01-18T09:03:00.000-08:00

...Alberta. It seems that the Alberta winter's have finally found Marcus and I. You just can't hide from them. Well, that's not true. Mr. Cold North wind doesn't live out here. Nor does the "I like to make the thermometer drop to -30". No, it's just been really snowy out here. I don't mind it much myself, but I don't have to drive in it. And yes the roads do get incredibly slippery out here, and all the steep hills don't help, but the main problem are the drivers. Vancouverites themselves are the first to admit they have no idea how to drive in snowy conditions. Their first reaction is to floor the gas or the brake and then begin to yell (or scream) and turn the steering wheel wildly. Can any of you Alberta folk tell where they failed the driving lesson? Oh well. And yes, my dear sweet counterpart has written an entire blog on the mayhem already. So I don't really have much more to add, except photos...

View from our balcony, 4pm(ish)

Intrigued Chloe, following day

avoiding regret

2007-01-10T09:20:00.000-08:00

I'm soo happy... my mommy is going to fly out here at the end of the month for one of my final dress shopping adventures. I was really feeling pretty blue about the fact that she couldn't share this experience with me. It's a once in a lifetime mother-daughter thing to do. And I wasn't feeling blue because bringing the mom along to find your wedding dress is tradition, I was sad because I really wanted her to be there when I walked out of the change room onto that little podium and saw me as a woman. It's silly, I guess. But I knew it would be one of those things that I would feel regret about a little later in life. So I decided to be proactive, for once, and not let this experience slip away. I talked to my mom and she was feeling very much the same way. So now she'll be on a flight out here at the end of the month. Lisa and I can show here my top two or three dresses and I think I'll probably be able to make a decision from there... I will either choose one of the dresses or come up with a design myself and have a dear friend (and amazing designer) sew it up for me.

My son is my son till he gets him a wife,
but my daughter is my daughter all the days of her life.

positive weekend, but i still cried

2007-01-08T09:10:00.000-08:00

So Saturday was amazingly fun! Thanks to miss Lisa for coming along on the dress shopping expedition and for providing much needed girl time. We went to two different bridal shops and also returned to the first store I had visited (back in like November) so that I could compare my fav dress there with others we had found. The verdict... I have a new favorite dress! And let's just say "WOW"! I found it at the second shop we visited. I was a little apprehensive about trying stuff on when we walked in the door because one of the first dresses we saw had a price tag of $4300, which sorry to say is way over my dress budget. But upon exploring the racks a little more, we discovered that most dress weren't too horribly priced, some were down right affordable for the design. Once the sales assistance saw the types of dresses I was pulling out she suggested one for me and put it on the pile of things to try on.

And so the process of squeezing into dresses and zipping and pinning began. I actually found several there that were very flattering, but then I tried on the dress that the sales assistant had suggested. I stepped onto the podium in front of the three-way mirrors and "wow" was all I could say. I looked amazing and it made me feel amazing, which is the general idea behind finding the perfect dress. But to put the icing on the cake, the sales assistant slipped a little sleeveless lace bolero onto me and I was sold. It is ultimately my favorite in ways that most dresses can't compare. The dress itself also simplifies a lot of alteration costs, undergarments, and accessories.

And thanks again to Lisa, I'm being the responsible bride and waiting at least a week. Then we'll head back down and try on my top two or three all in a row for good comparison. From there I should be able to decide. Plus this gives me the chance to figure out how each dress will fit into the overall design of the wedding day.

So it was a grand day, but didn't end with dress shopping. Lisa and I headed out to the mall where I found a nice shirt. Then we grabbed some groceries and met up with the boys (including Hayden) at Jared and Lisa's, had some good BBQ, and played a great board game called Settlers of Catan which Marcus and I have been wanting to try for a while. All in all a good night.

Sunday started with church, and then hotdogs from 7/11, then we visited a game store in Port Coquitlam and picked up our very own copy of Settlers of Catan, which we already played twice last night. The evening ended with a short crying session, but still, it was a wonderful weekend.

giddy

2007-01-05T09:05:00.000-08:00

I'm giddy happy! Tomorrow I'm off to go dress shopping! It will be my second attempt to find the perfect wedding dress. Hopefully miss Lisa will be joining me, which will make the adventure all that much more fun. I made two appointments, both in downtown New West. One is at Sposa Wedding and one is at Lisa's Bridal. Wish me luck!

the date is set

2007-01-04T09:44:00.000-08:00

I keep forgetting to blog about my wedding date, but it's not like I'm not currently living and breathing everything wedding related, I just keep forgetting to brag about it a bit.

The big day is set for Saturday, November 24th, 2007. We're having the wedding ceremony and reception at the same venue, the Al Azhar Shrine Centre in Bowness (northwest Calgary) right on the bow river. Marcus and I both grew up in Bowness (his father owned the Bowness Hotel) so we thought it was quite fitting to have our wedding within the community. The Shrine centre is also a wonderful venue and several friends of the family have had weddings there. We'll be married in front of a big fireplace and there's a dining area with a dance floor. Now we just have to figure out the other 166 details (yes, that's the actual number of "to dos" left), minus the chore of finding a photographer, whom we have already found.

Marcus is working on our official couple's website, which will have loads of wedding details, but which we also intend to maintain as our personal (and future family) website. It's all very exciting! I'll let everyone know when that's complete.

new year, less guilt

2007-01-03T09:19:00.000-08:00

I figured I'd better post something soon before I get too wrapped up in the new year to remember what I did for New Year's Eve, which is, not much. Stayed at home, started drawing and doing art again (which I've been neglecting since mid-November). Marcus and I shared some smoked oysters on ritz crackers and a bottle of sparkling non-alcoholic cider. I watched Speed (where is Keanu these days?) while Marcus played on Sindome. We didn't plan on staying up for midnight, but we got wrapped up in watching episodes of Angel and before we knew it people were cheering and setting off fireworks in the rain throughout the neighborhood. Happy New Year!

I don't generally make New Year's resolutions, and I don't necessarily consider this a resolution, but I need to work on my guilt quota. By that, I mean, I need to harbor less guilt. It drags me down, has for years. And I'm learning from my dearest of dear friends and soon-to-be husband that I don't need to have guilt over everything. Lots of things are not my fault and I don't need to accept responsibility for them. I just need to let go. I'm sort of hoping that going to church will help me in this area. And no, I'm not attending my guilt festering Catholic church. At least going to church will act as a reminder. It might seem kind of lame or weak, but it's what I need right now. It must be what I need right now, because both times that we've gone to church, so far, I've nearly burst into tears. Not sure what that's about... well maybe I do, but I'm just starting to work through that.

I also have a goal of losing 15 pounds before the wedding. Guess I should go out and buy a scale to keep track of that. Marcus is working on a similar goal. I also think I'll buy a set of hand weights to use at home. Need to work on my arms. I used to love my arms, but now that I'm not doing heavy lifting at work on a daily basis, they've gone to flab. So much to do, and only 24 hours in each day.

Christmas in a hurricane

2006-12-21T18:04:00.000-08:00

So, Marcus and were looking forward to finally experiencing Christmas on the west coast. We figured we'd check out the infamous Christmas light display at Stanley Park, ride the little holiday train, explore some of the other events and displays in and around the lower mainland. But then of course, we got more freaky weather, as if we hadn't had enough freaky weather for most of November. Hurricane force winds, torrential rain, power outages, and other good stuff has put a serious damper on all festivities. Sitting in our little apartment in New West you probably wouldn't know that anything bad had happened, but drive five-ten minutes in any direction and you see the problems. Several cities were without power for over two days, including our local mall (poor little Christmas shoppers). In Seattle, a co-worker was without power for five days. We, however, didn't lose power once. Stanley Park, well, it's trashed to say the least. I'm not just talking about the Christmas lights either. Entire sections of trees came down, so now the lush inner city rain forest looks like it's just been clearcut. Oh, sections of the park have re-open, but they figure it will take at least a year to clean up the mess. I'm kind of feeling like we live in the eye of every storm.

As for our Christmas on the west coast, well...we're spending it indoors for the most part. Bought ourselves a new dvd player, got lots of new dvds from the fam for Christmas, so we're set. We already made little "gingerbread" houses from graham crackers and decorated them with loads of candy. Tomorrow night might be paper snowflake night.

Happy holidays from the soggy coast!

homesick

2006-11-25T21:05:00.000-08:00

it's 9:10pm and it's snowing out. gentle flakes falling lazily. can't even see all the green lawns or blooming bushes. i miss actual winter. rain isn't winter. i can't wait to be back in Calgary in -20 weather. call me crazy.

wedding dress shopping: day one

2006-11-11T16:46:00.000-08:00

So I went wedding dress shopping. I've been looking online at all sorts of dresses, but I finally made an appointment at one of the boutiques in downtown New West. (which by the way, is wedding central for the entire lower mainland). My mom was suppose to fly out for the weekend and we were going to go dress shopping together, but sadly, she came down with the flu. So off I went by myself. I was pretty sad about going alone at first because it's like this huge deal and traditionally brides-to-be take their bestfriends or mother along to share the whole experience. But I'm still hoping my mom can come out after Christmas to help me make my final decision on the dress.

Anyway, I did have a lot of fun, mainly because the dresses are just sooo absolutely gorgeous! I consider myself to be a fairly proficient sewer and that's why I enjoyed myself so much. I was in awe of the beauty and quality of these bridal dresses. The details! Amazing! The boutique I went to was very nice and I had a great sales assistant, Irina. I tried on several different dresses. Since it was my first day out, I told Irina I was up for trying anything on. I was mostly interested in figuring out what flattered and what didn't. I narrowed my choices for the day down to three favourites, which she registered under my file, so I can go back at anytime to re-try them. Wanna see my choices?

My absolute fav dress thus far is the Tabrett gown by Maggie Sottero in Vienna Cream. Second runner up is the Vincenza gown also by Maggie Sottero (keep in mind the color combo that I like is diamond white/oyster so the detail in the pleats and the embroidery is much more subtle than their example). Third runner up is the Brittanya Lynette, again, by Maggie Sottero in Diamond White (which is a bit creamy). Not bad for my first day out. There's still several boutiques in downtown New West to visit. I'll keep you posted on my progress.

increasing gladness

2006-11-05T15:14:00.000-08:00

Chloe's test results for feline leukemia and AIDS came back negative!! This calls for a beer and tuna (the beer is for me, of course). Guess she has a kindey infection which her antibiotics should clear up in a week or so.

I made another batch of jam last night. This time Blackberry jam and it turned out wonderfully. So I guess things are improving. Still need to get a new coffee maker and sleep off this migraine. Then everything will be puppy dogs and rainbows.

My mom is flying out on Thrusday night to stay for a few days. Haven't seen her since July. We're going wedding dress shopping while she's in town. I can't wait. The stuff little girl's dreams are made of.

Unlucky couple of days

2006-11-04T08:56:00.000-08:00

So Marcus is out of town and Chloe and I are here alone, so of course that's when things go sour.

First, I took Chloe to the vet for her annual vaccination and check-up. Turns out she has sore red gums (even though we responsibly feed her good quality crunchy food and tartar treats) and a fever. So they ask to do some blood work and screen for Feline Leukemia and AIDS. (it's either that or she has a dental disease). I agree, of course. So they take her in the back room and I can hear them struggling with her and know how squirmy and bitey she can be. Then I hear what sounds like an electric shaver. Eventually they bring her back to me. She looked absolutely terrified. The electric shaver sound was an actual shaver. She now has a furless chunk around her neck. They gave me some antibiotics to give her for the next ten days to help her ammune system. So now, twice a day, I have to attempt to hold her down, open her mouth, and squirt this liquid medication into her mouth and get her to swallow it (not spit it out). It's been fun so far.

Then last night I decided it would be the perfect opportunity to make some jam in preperation of Christmas. Things went fine, but the jam won't set up. So now I have eight jars of delicious strawberry-raspberry syrup.

And then I get up at 7:30 this morning to start work, give the cat her meds and all that fun. I put some coffee on right away so that it'll be done when by the time I force the meds down the cats throat. Coffee maker is dead. Yep. Dead. No coffee. I just about went back to bed, but I did the responsible thing and made some hot chocolate. I feel a little more soothed. Now it's time to get to work.

I miss Marcus.

gray

2006-10-15T17:45:00.000-07:00

The winter rain is here.
I brace myself for the inner turmoil,
for the ache that will compound
and weigh heavy
on each day.
The months will pass slowly,
the days even slower.
The voices will gain strength,
as they always do,
and coax me closer to the edge.

Thy fate is the common fate of all;
Into each life some rain must fall,
some days be dark and dreary.
-Henry Wadsworth
Longfellow

plain picture

2006-09-29T16:20:00.000-07:00

What's the meaning behind a photo of toes, where the big toes have red nailpolish and the others are bare? This is the type of question I've been facing for the past week. The batch of images I'm keywording is driving me nuts. They're so plain and yet utterly conceptual and stupifying. I just can't wait to get through them! Give me some good 'ol office photos to do or even some beach scenes with skinny chicks is beautiful bathing suits. Anything but this!

I am what I keyword. Also, I am what I eat, and most recently, that was the last of my bag of Rainbow Twizzlers. Gotta love artificially and naturally fruit flavoured licorice (what ever happen to just plain jane black licorice?). Anyway, I ended up labelling the toe image as having to do with quirky, individuality (besides being just toes). (sigh).

actually future mrs. r

2006-09-07T16:18:00.000-07:00

Oh so giddy happy! Haven't taken the time to write until now. But it's not because of lack of enthusiasm. Mainly, it's because I get sort of nauseous when I start thinking about it. But not in a bad way. No sir, it's definately a good thing. I am now actually the Future Mrs. R.

Oh, my head is so spinning! I knew it would happen, but now it's for real-FOR REAL! So many things to consider, but it's gonna be fun to plan the wedding. I hope I don't drive all my friends and family nuts. All those little girl dreams have to be considered. Oh I know, I sound like a diva already...

Saturday, Sept, 2nd

This is the sushi restaurant that we had dinner at in Hope, BC.
We discovered it three years ago on our first road trip together. Such good sushi!

And across the street from the restaurant is the hotel
Marcus made reservations at. Again, we had stayed there on a previous road trip,
except this time, Marcus got a room with a jacuzzi tub.
He also set up tea light candles and bouquets of flowers everywhere.
It was in this uber romantic setting that he proposed.

The morning after...
we had a huge breakfast at Rolly's and this time there was no woman
with a pet bird in her cleavage (don't ask).

And thus concludes a look at our engagement.
Oh, trust me, there was way more, but none I care to share with anyone except Marcus. Blush-blush.

August 26th, 2000

2006-08-26T06:37:00.000-07:00

It's funny, the things you remember. Like, on this day and around this time six years ago, I was being dropped off at my brother's house in preparation for his wedding that day. His fiance and fiance's sister and I went to Swizzle Sticks in Kensington first thing that morning to get our hair and make-up done. We had lunch at Red Robins. It was the first time I ever felt like I had sisters. Because it was, really. I miss her. But mainly I miss her because it hurts my brother so much now that she's not a part of his life any more. I worry about him so much sometimes, it hurts to speak.

It scares me too, you know. I really live by the examples that have been set before me. And I know that I'm my own person and Marcus and I aren't at all like my brother and his wife or like my parents, but it's hard not to see those examples and wonder what will happen to us. I want it to be like my parents, you know, and be able to stick it out through 36+ years of marriage or like my grandparents who are onto their like 56th. But I can only make it happen 50% of the way. It's up to the other person to make it 100%, since you can't be married to yourself. I guess that's what I've learned from my brother's divorce. You can love a person all you want and make sacrifices for them, but if they don't love or work just as hard, the relationship can't happen. I'm not saying there's an in balance in my relationship with Marcus or anything like that. I'm just saying, I wonder what will happen to us?

Abundance is loving someone
and being able to live your lives together.

aaahh, what just happened?

2006-08-21T07:07:00.000-07:00

Okay, so my tip for the week, possibly the month... do not rent UltraViolet. Don't. Just don't. No. Watched it last night. I have no idea what we watched. It certaintly wasn't a movie, you know, with like a plot, storyline, character development, good action or fight scenes, cool futuristic stuff. None of that. The only thing I enjoyed was how her clothes changed colour. That's it. Not even the three seconds of the movie where Mila is naked makes UltraViolet worth renting. I thought maybe it was just me, but when Marcus says half way through the movie, "I feel like my soul has been tainted", you know it's bad. I personally got a stomach ach. And we couldn't bring ourselves to eat the ice cream we bought at sev 'cause we didn't want to ruin perfectly delicious ice cream. So, ya, don't rent it and especially don't rent it with someone unless you're trying to run them off from your life.

work, dance, food, art, sleep

2006-08-20T08:48:00.000-07:00

I know I've been writting about my art lately and not much about my life (although they're very much intertwined at this point). Anyway, thought I would dwell on the mundane for a bit.

Been getting up around 6am most days, except for today. Been working. Finally gotten to the point where the keywording is becoming pretty second nature. And yes, I find myself doing it through the entire course of the day, whether I'm walking down the street or sleeping. Been trying to fit time in the afternoon to do my dance workout. I'm so out of shape, it's not funny. No, not funny at all. I can only really do just over 30min, with a bit of warm up and cool down. But I enjoy it. The cat sits there and watches me. She doesn't really get it. I've also been fitting in about an hour of art society stuff most days, well , maybe 4 days a week. I make supper. Nothing too exciting in that department. I spend about 45min - an hour doing my hand-stitching art sitting out on the balcony in the evening, watching the neighbourhood cats below. And then I spend another half hour working on whatever other art stuff needs getting done (postcards, sketches, writing). Then I give the cat here treats and read in bed for about an hour in order to wind by brain down enough to sleep. That's a day in the life of the Future Mrs. R. Oh, there's lots of kissing and playing and talking with the cat throughout the day, and in the evening there's lots of kissing and talking with Marcus, but no playing, because he generally has a meeting with his business partners. But I understand. It leaves me to do my art.

And then there are the few days a month where the mundane stops, like going to Science World and seeing the Egyptian Lego exhibition. Way cool. And playing with weird science stuff and being pushed out of the way by children or having the children show you how the mechanism works. I'm a bit slow when it comes to science. We also had the lovely Frenches over for Sunday afternoon slurpees and dinner one day, finally, after a year. And of course, there was the most super-ific day, August 8th to be exact. Most definately the farthest from mundane. It will stick with me for the rest of my life... shopping for beautiful sparkly diamond rings. That day may be slightly overshadowed when the opportunity comes for me to wear the gorgeous bling, but I won't forget it. How can I? He treated me like a princess and took the first step to saying, "I want to be with you for the rest of my life". Thank you. I needed that.

the pink stuff

2006-08-17T07:00:00.000-07:00

Art is the demonstration that the ordinary

is extraordinary.

-Amedee Ozenfant

So, here it is. Gumshoe II. Completed and shipped. I sincerely hope it survived the journey and didn't melt or break. I overcame some technical difficulties faced in the first gumshoe and definately improved the design process. Hope it's new owner appreciates the "pinkness" to it.

I know that all through art school, professors nagged and nagged at us about how important it was to simply produce work; the importance of making the time and absorbing ourselves into the art world. Well, I guess I finally understand. Two years out of school, and I'm finally getting it. It took a year to switch from the education world to the real world and let my creative batteries re-juice a bit. Another year to find the drive to make art again and re-learn everything that my mind and hands had forgotten. I still can't draw a self-portrait without it looking like I drew it back in grade eight. So, I'm still dealing with basic drawing exercises. It will come with time and plenty of work.

And the difference in how I feel, from not doing any art to producing a small variety... it might just be the exposure to the sun, finally, but some of it has to do with getting my creative side going again. Seriously, it's like the difference between being depressed and, well, not be depressed. But hey, some of it's about the sun, so don't think I'm claiming that art is the ultimate healing power. Art just helps a bit.

I don't think you can really feel good mentally by just dipping your toe in the creative juices. Pretty sure you have to be at least ankle deep before you'll benefit from anything it has to offer. That said, however, get your ass off the couch and go to a gallery or museum. It's one small, but very good, step towards getting your art career back on track. The next step is committing to an on-going art project, even if it's just with yourself. Keep the idea small and the time committment even smaller, so you don't overwhelm yourself. Before you know it, you'll be wanting to do more and put more time aside to create. Seriously, it happens. After several months you'll probably even be prepared to make some larger project committments. Take a risk. Get involved in the greater art community. Boom. You've just got your art practice going again.

And hey, no, you can't slack at any point now or in the future. Slackers aren't artists. It's the worse myth/cultural stereotype there is. Artists are not slackers, slackers cannot be artists. If you think you can just sit around at home and draw and some big shot will just hand you an exhibition space and a couple thousand dollars to travel and study art, forget it. Find another career choice. Get the hell out of the way, because I've got art to make. And ya, art is a "career" and a "profession". I'm not gonna dump it in some secondary hole titled "interest" or "hobby". Forget it. I'm done with that. I'm not gonna feel shitty about a practice that has influenced civilizations and cultures just as much as science and medicine. I'm gonna put art on a pedestal, write it on the top of the "to do" list, and live and breathe it. People with excuses, can zip it. If you have time to make an excuse for not doing art, you have time to make art. Period.

Done.

That's my rant.

Go on working, freely and furiously,
and you will make progress.
-Paul Gauguin

yep, one year...

2006-08-11T09:41:00.000-07:00

...one year, indeed. One year ago, Marcus and I loaded up a uHaul truck and moved to the west coast. One year ago, we began living together. One year ago, I started my first job outside of retail in over 6 & 1/2 years. One year ago, well... there were a lot of changes. More than my body and mind could almost really deal with. But that was a year ago. I'm still functioning. I may not love it out here, but my love is here and so I stay and will most likely stay for the next 3-5 years (depending on how everything in our lives go).

It's not horrible. I love our apartment and our kitty Chloe keeps me company all day and night (she never leaves me alone, really, which is fine by me). I like the mild weather, although, I'm really gonna have to figure out some way to survive another gray, dark winter out here. Just another challenge in a string of challenges that seem to define our lives. But I keep pluggin away at it. That's all one can do really.

Happiness lies in the absorption in some
vocation which satisfies the soul.
Henry Ward Beecher

I've given up stressing over things I no longer really have control over. Instead, I've been focusing on my own stuff. I'm no longer gonna use the little free time I have in endeavors which no one else are interested in. Why should I sacrifice when there's no one there to back me up?! So I'm on to my own stuff, particularly my own artwork. I've been trying to do some art every day, whether that's hand stitching (this new series of works in progress), postcards, bubblegum art, or photography or whatever, makes no difference. My new moto is "there's always time to create". And sure, some nights, I just don't or can't, but those nights are far less than the creative ones, which is a huge step.

Also, gonna start working on the body health too. The art side fulfills some of the mental health, but my body has been taking a vacation for the past year. Sitting at the computer, not even having to walk anywhere to or from work, has taken its toll. My dance DVDs arrived yesterday, so I started in on them in the afternoon. Did about 45 min. of dance (which doesn't seem long, but I definately over did it and paid for it all night long). Just goes to show how dead my body really is. But I'm determined to improve.

This past week involved work, drying bubblegum shoe art, rain, virtual fish tank, pirates, big bling, drying herbs from the garden, more rain, migrains, and scrabble (which Marcus won). An incredible week actually. Thanks babe, for spending lots and lots of time with me. I know you'll soon be crazy busy with the company stuff. But I do appreciate it so much! And no, my heart hasn't stopped beating fast yet. Maybe I should walk down to the hospital...

in the mean time

2006-08-03T10:52:00.000-07:00

I'm patiently waiting for my dance DVDs to arrive. Yep, seriously. It's my new plan in an attempt to tone and increase my cardio. I love dance, but I'm way too intimidated right now to take an actual class. Besides, it's way cheaper this way and I'll be able to do it more often than a once-a-week class. In the mean time, I'm trying to cut back on the coke and drink more water, but haven't quite given up on the candy and chocolate. Don't think I will either. Need the sugar boost in the afternoon to keep me going (especially since I get up at 6:20 every morning now... also a change I made recently to maximize my time on earth). However, besides these somewhat "healthy" changes, I've had the urged of late to smoke cigars. So the late evening is reserved, on occassion, to a stogie on the balcony. Balance. It's all about balance. And trying not to be wound so tight, as someone recently pointed out about me (thanks Mr. Brown, no really, I need that). If you have tips on how not to go crazy or how to feel like more than a waste, please be so kind as to let me know. So, here I am, still waiting for my dance DVDs...

at the last minute

2006-07-27T07:16:00.000-07:00

the optimisim is definately gone. now I simply ask, "why do I bother?"

drop of optimism

2006-07-24T13:11:00.000-07:00

Never think of myself as being overly optimistic, but today I seem to have a drop of positive energy I'd like to add to the glass.

"Mad as we are, cannot fail"

That pretty much sums up my current feelings. My friends and I are crazy enough that there doesn't seem to be room for failure. How could there be? Know you guys are going through rough crap lately, but honestly, we're each nuts enough to pull off our dreams. That feels impossible most days, but when I think about what we each bring to the world... I mean, wow. We could do anything. So there world. Take that. And watch out, 'cause our minds are 'bout to birth some wicked creativity and inflict a few changes.

"Hope flickering, like moths in the night"

-today's blog was brought to you by the letter "O" and the stylings of "Erasure"

Hot and bothered...

2006-07-21T17:17:00.000-07:00

but not like you think. It's hot. Hot. Hot. Hot here today. The high of 34 degrees isn't bad if all you have to do is sun tan or drink beer on a patio, but forget trying to actually accomplish work. So here I sit in out little apartment sans air conditioner surronded by big windows with the sun beating in. Even with our fan on high and not really moving, just typing, sweat is dripping down my legs. Yep. Seriously. But on the plus side, I down loaded that super catchy techno song from that Jimmy Fallon/ Park Posey Pepsi commercial. So good. Makes me want to run the streets naked in this heat. But don't worry. I still have my sanity and self-consciousness, so no real danger there. Now it's finally off to pick up Marcus and find an air conditioned restaurant for dinner. Thinking the White Spot. Then there's the possibility of eating a mountain of mini cream puffs for dessert. Seriously.

the sweetest little fella

2006-07-20T09:42:00.000-07:00

Okay, So I'm sure your familiar with the movie Ginger Snaps. Well, we have this little convenience store at the end of our block and the nice little ol' asian man who runs the place looks exactly like the nice little ol' janitor who helps out Brigitte in Ginger Snaps. I know I'm a movie freak, but Marcus said the same thing. I was kind of creeped out at first, but the little ol' asian man is really sweet. I went into the store yesterday to buy some flowers for Marcus, but all he had ready were potted plants. Ginger Snaps Janitor asked if I could wait ten minutes and asked what price range I was looking for. I said $10 and looked at magazines for a few minutes. And sure enough Ginger Snaps Janitor was behind the counter making up a bouquet. Now you got to picture the place, it's your basic local skeezy convenience store, but from behind the counter he creates a beautiful BIG bouquet, and wraps it all nice and charges me $10. It made my day. I hope it brightened Marcus'. Thanks Ginger Snaps Janitor!

15 pieces of flare

2006-07-18T08:46:00.000-07:00

Yep, watched Office Space Sunday with the Frenchs. Although Milton and Samir are my fav characters, I do love the whole bit about "flare".

"If you want me to wear 37 pieces of flare than why not make the minimum 37 pieces of flare!?!"

So good. My flare these days is when I choose not to wear pajamas for the whole day while sitting at the computer working. In fact, I haven't worn pjs all day for a while. I'll get right on that. And while I'm at it, I'll make sure to file that TPS report accordingly. How many people do you think quit their office job after seeing that movie? I just don't think I could do it, work in an office environment day in and day out for years. But that leaves me with the ever-lasting-gob-stopper of questions, "What the hell should I do as a career?"

Actually, the funniest part (or maybe the saddest) is that most of the photos I keyword are office photos. "Businesspeople" wearing their "suits" and "pantsuits" "talking" on "cell phones", "working", "typing", taking a "coffee break", and always looking "determined", "satisfied", "confident", or have "ambition" and the "corporate ladder" on their minds. A good week is when I find myself keywording photos of people on the beach, families at home, or simplistic still lifes. The most fun keywording... kid's birthday parties. Yep. Their uplifting and there's always good cakes and treats to look at, too. That's my little world.

one down, three million to go

2006-07-15T09:20:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm proud. I'm beaming even, accept for the bags under my eyes from lack of sleep. I drew last night for almost an hour. Yep. Not long in the scheme of things I suppose, but long enough to get the wheels going in my art brain. Came up with an idea for the at-arts show (and it doesn't really require paper). Also managed to draw one horrible self-portrait. Man it's hard to get back into traditional figure drawing. But reverted and decided to do some blind contours.

Suggestions for those trying to get back into the art stuff: start small. do warm-up exercises that we thought were lame in art school. do not get frustrated. do not use black conte while working in a room with white to cream carpet. do not flip through old sketchbooks and expect to draw like that right away again. stay loose. yep, loose. do open your old printmaking tool box and inhale the fumes. do attempt to remember all those things that helpful profs once said. nothing is coming to mind at the moment (probably need more coffee).

Good luck! (look ma, I used a font colour)

what kind of artist...

2006-07-14T08:45:00.000-07:00

What kind of artist moves to a new province and leaves all their drawing paper, newsprint, and drawing board at their old house in Calgary?! Well, that would be me. Even the DaRaddishman left his mound of paper behind. I distinctly remember him asking to store it at my bro's house. I don't know what we were thinking, especially since we'll be here now for sometime. I had such an urge to draw yesterday. I searched all the portfolios we moved, but none contained usuable paper. Guess we're off on another adventure. A quest for a good art supply store and good drawing paper. I'm gonna try my best at doing a self-portrait for the upcoming show, if I can get paper soon, and warm back up to drawing. I actually find the quest to find paper more daunting than trying to re-teach myself figure drawing.

oops, now my brain is busy, busy, busy thinking about all the art related work I need to do before Septempber. It seems to come in waves. All the deadlines and projects. With generally two weeks in between where I just block it all out.

for now it's on to work that I actually get paid for.

Blurbing

2006-06-28T18:26:00.000-07:00

I swore I wouldn't do this. Wouldn't create a blog. I hate the word. "Blog". Ugh. So I'm going to delude myself into calling this "blurbing" because that' s really want it is. Blurbs regarding people's lives, current events, and such. Anywho, I guess I finally gave in because I miss all my friends in Calgary and communicate with you'all through your blogs. I make you write and write just to keep myself abreast and amused. So now it's my turn. Though I don't have tons to write about. It'll come I guess.